An Update #2

001.Seeing as my last update has been over a month ago, I thought I would write another one just because I felt like sharing some personal things with all of my lovely readers (I appreciate every single one of you!). As you might have noticed I haven’t been blogging much at all-in April, and my last blog post has been over a week ago, which is a little bit shocking. I haven’t been into blogging at all, because a lot has been going on this past month. I’ve been really busy, had a lot to deal with RE: my personal life and I just didn’t have much inspiration to blog. I also didn’t want to blog just for the sake of it, because I want my heart to be in it, and I want to share my passion for writing and beauty with all of you. I don’t know if I’m the only one who feels like this?! I hope the month of May will bring me more inspiration and give me my passion back.

002. A little bit on my personal life; me and my boyfriend of almost 2.5 years broke up in the beginning of April. I don’t want to share too much about the situation, but as much as it hurts, I am now starting to think that we’re both better of this way. I’m not really feeling my blog at the moment though; it’s like my tastes in beauty and style are constantly changing and I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’m constantly trying to be another person because I’m not comfortable with myself, the way I look, the way my personality is and the way I’m living my life at the moment and the chaos I’m in. I really need to start sorting my life out and I think since we’re getting into the beginning of May, it’s the perfect time for a new start, starting off with a nice spring clean. My social life has also been non-existent, so I’m also planning on changing that. Beware- a new Charlotte is coming your way!

003. Time for some positivity; I’ve also been really busy with driving lessons. My driving exam is on the 14th of May, and I’m already so nervous for it I feel sick. I’m going tos crew it up just because I’m nervous like that. My beautician course is also going really well and I feel like if I can get my beautician license this summer I have a legit reason tob e really proud of myself since it will be my first ‘real’ achievement (after getting my driving license, of course). I’m still doubting about what I’m going to study at uni this coming September. I used to be so certain about going to study Journalism sicne it was what I’ve always wanted, but my beautician course has made me feel unsure about what I want to do with my life, which is one of the many reasons I’ve been feeling really down lately. I love writing, but there are so many things I want to do in life. Ah well.

004. I’m currently readin A Casual Vacancy as I’m still struggling with reading Lolita, which requires a lot of concentration. I really like A Casual Vacancy though, it’s a really easy read. The only downside to it is that there are A LOT of characters and I sometimes struggle with remembering who is who, but it’s a really easy read and I’m happy I picked it up. It’s nice to read something else from J.K. Rowling, even though it’s a little bit weird to read something else than Harry Potter. I love the way she describes things though and she has a really authentic feel to all of her books.

005. I also had a haircut last week, which I'm still not sure about- they were supposed to dye it back to my natural colour since I'm planning on growing my hair out, but they dyed it way too dark. They then had to put some sort of lightening product on it, which worked but I now have some blonde bits  shining through. They also cut in a straight fringe, but they cut it way too short and not that straight. I also find that my hair gets greasy so much quicker than normal, which makes me feel gross and just urghh. This has also been contributing to my current bad mood.

I’m sorry for this enormous post about me (it feels a little bit narcistic, writing that much about yourself), but I’m really glad I wrote my feelings down; it feels kind of relieving. I feel like I’ve got much more control over my thoughts now, and it feels really really good to finally be able to see through the chaos that is my life. As I said, May is for new beginnings and a fresh start. I’m starting my spring clean tomorrow, starting with clothes, and I’ve already got qutie a few new blog posts lining up. Here’s to hoping I’ll finally find my own style in May, and I really hope I will finally find out what I want in life this month.